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moments...

..and here we are firmly into a new year and I am sitting up wide awake in bed, yet again... I am reflecting upon what was in 2013 and what wasn't.

The 'what wasn'ts ' are left where they are, filed and duly noted, I shall unremember them.

However for the 'what was' ' and that which I choose to bring with me into 2014, are the things that are memorable, enriching, happy and surprising, be them the tiniest fragment of joy or the biggest new thing on the block!

I didn't get off to a great start in January as we had only recently lost Mumma a few months before, the countdown to my son's second year of uni starting mud summer in the States and i was in the middle of a roller-coaster of negotiations trying to secure a business lease and plan for a potential opening. I wasn't at my best and i was running low on fuel.

However as always when faced with a challenge I was defiant and rose to several occasions, decisions with all the positivity I could muster and determined to secure a purpose for myself and create something new for the city and opportunities for like-minded creatives and enthusiasts.

For most of the year I have been up to my painted eyebrows in lists, plans, accounts, coffee by the bucket load. The summer came and went, a few calm hours spent swinging in my hammock with Monty lounging in the shade underneath!
My son bravely ventured to up-state new York, defiantly resisting a few weeks at home for the seasonal holidays, where he remains, working hard, playing too, retaining A grades all round and Skype-ing his mum on demand! Bless the boy.

My friends, as always, have supported me at every step, picked me up when I stumbled and kicked me up the bum when I doubted ...I thank you all. I only hope I give back adequately when you need me.

My siblings,with whom we initially reunited in hardened purpose and now have found ourselves in friendship, is a surprising joy and gift.

I am excited to be adding to my wee family as I am hoping to rescue a small pup and he should arrive in a few weeks  time...it will be like having a toddler in the house again. watch this space, it really all rests on whether the cat approves!!

The future is brighter, actually NO!! the NOW is brighter..I want to be present in the now, 'cos it's taken me a long time to realise, I mean really realise, that is all we have.
The past is gone, over, just a memory somewhere inside...but being present and tangibly making myself FEEL everything, every word, thought, feeling, touch...is all there is, and all there ever will be...no more what if's, no more well this might or might not happen...
It is Now writing this post, that matters and is the only real thing, this moment...

and so here is 2014, unfolding...live in each moment... now that IS exciting!

Saz x

Joey - 4 months old, arriving early Feb

Saz x

Comments

  1. Hope 2014 is a fabulous year for you, sending much love up to you in Cumbria xxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. aww bless you gwennie....luv saz x

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  2. Good luck with the dog - looks like a great companion so hope it all works well.
    YOU looked fabulous in your previous post too - congratulations on the nomination. I am sure it is well deserved.
    And perhaps it takes time in a dark tunnel to appreciate the small things in life. I am much better at it now, can self soothe turbulent thoughts better and try to worry much less! 2014 can just be - whatever it brings :)


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yes Fi it certainly gets better in time...
      l'm so much more appreciative of the NOW..being in the moment..what on earth is the point of fretting about the future and wallowing in the past....ridiculous...such a waste of decades lol...

      take care, thanks fo rdropping by!
      luv saz x

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  3. you inspired me: http://fourpawsandwhiskers.blogspot.co.nz/2014/01/living-in-now.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lovely post, thanks for the honour..now thats a moment to cherish already...new attitude is making a difference already WOW..powerful stuff eh?
      luv sazx x

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  4. given the way 2013 started for you i am so glad your now is brighter. it's a hard lesson, one i am still working on...the now, the now, the now. and i like your idea of unremembering. i shall have to hold on to that.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Very inspiring Saz - read you at Fi's blog too.
    Happy NOW to you

    ( that dog looks a rascals!!!)

    Take care my friend- great to see you here again x

    ReplyDelete
  6. For some weird reason , I have not been getting updates for your blog - it was telling me the last post you wrote was 9 months ago - hence the lack of comments. Loved the dress you wore to the award... you do look fabulous! Wishing you all the best for 2014 and particularly with your new 4-legged friend. I do so miss mine. x

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  7. The NOW is all there is, my friend. Enjoy the good memories, make the fun plans, but ignore the things you cannot change or which have not come into being. A very good friend of mine, a priest, once said that every day is Christmas because each morning we are given a new present (Get it? Present? It's all we truly have to work with, so we may as well make the most of it!)

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Thanks for stopping by!

Take the weight of your feet, draw up a chair and pour yourself a cuppa. Leave your troubles at the door and together we shall ride out the storms.
I will walk a while in your shoes...

Saz x

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